Overheard in the teachers' room

I am addicted to coffee. Tempting me everyday, there is a drive-thru Starbucks on the way to work. Usually I'm running too late to stop, but this morning I was actually running early for once. I decided to allow myself this one little treat to get me through the day.

I clutched my coffee in my hands during the morning meeting. My reasons were two-fold--I was trying to warm my hands while hiding from the other teachers what I was holding. The Japanese are a very inquisitive people, especially when it comes to what foreigners eat and drink. I used to bring a Nalgene bottle filled with water to school and set it on my desk. Even though the bottle clearly contained water, everyone, teachers and students, felt the need to stop and ask me what was in my bottle. Though it was tempting to fill it with sake, it always contained water--what I would logically guess to be in a clear container. Anyway, I knew that if they saw too much of my coffee, it would be all over the school in no time. Not that there's anything wrong with drinking Starbucks coffee, I just didn't see a need for it to be the talk of the school.

One man stopped and asked me what I was holding. I quietly revealed the logo on the cup thinking that this would answer all questions. He gave me an inquisitive look.

"It's coffee," I explained. "From Starbucks."

"Ohhh."

Later in the day, I ran into him again.

"So did you drink your coffee?" he asked.

"Um, yes."

"In Japan, Starbucks is thought to be a sign that a place has become a big city. Places in the country don't have Starbucks; only cities have Starbucks."

Hmm, that certainly explains why one of only two drive-thru Starbucks in Japan are located here, the capital of the deep countryside.

"Do they have Starbucks in America?"

I contemplate my move. Sarcasm is lost on the Japanese, so I supress my natural urge to give a witty reply.

"I think they do. Actually, I think Starbucks came to Japan from America."
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I'm always getting asked these kinds of absurd questions, and usually when I respond they are awed. For instance, I was once asked if we had pears in America, as if everything that exists in Japan exists only here and nowhere else. I've often wondered if I would react the same to a foreigner back home. I don't think so, but maybe that's just because Americans tend to think that everywhere is or should be like us, and Japanese want to see themselves as unique. All I can do is sigh and remind myself that this is the only way they know how to react to me and converse with me.